When communication is too wordy, readers “gray out.” It is time to reduce wordiness.
From now on, imagine that each word you use will cost you 75¢! If money was involved (really, it is), we all would work on being clear and concise, without sounding abrupt or offensive.
Avoid using wordy constructions; instead, choose a word or shorter phrase that means the equivalent, such as:
The following phrases are unnecessary or awkward:
Wordy: The fact that the company had succeeded in…
Clear: The company’s success…
“In cases in which a claimant receives reimbursement under this provision for expenses that also will or may be reimbursed from another source, the claimant shall subrogate the United States to the claim for payment from the collateral source up to the amount for which the claimant was reimbursed under this provision.”
Huh? What did all that mean? If each word up there cost $1.00, that was a $52 paragraph!
“If you already got payments from us and from another source for expenses, you must pay back what we paid you.”
That $21 paragraph above is much more readable, isn’t it?
Reduce wordiness. Have mercy on the audience. Ensure that your message is received!
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